
Sheltering in place can lead to feeling pretty alone and isolated.
That sense of being separate can also happen during the divorce process, and it can be a scary time. As a divorce coach, I talk with my clients about the most important things for them as they navigate the divorce process. We try to peel back the layers and look at what is most unsettling, what is most significant, and what is changeable. Then together, we make a plan to help deal with everything, get the support they want and have expert resources to support them where needed through these changes. Divorce coaching is not deciding for people. It’s helping people decide for themselves, weigh alternatives, and find support for their decisions.In many cases, that support may mean just listening. People often start talking about being stressed about the next step to take or what is bothering them at home. Once they talk through everything with guidance and support, they come to their own conclusions. And they figure out their individual next steps. Those decisions are authentic to them and more meaningful. There’s a vast difference between having someone tell you what you should do and coming to your own next best step.
There are distinct advantages to partnering with a Divorce Coach. Divorce Coaches have been through this process with others; usually, someone facing divorce has not (and even if they have experienced a divorce in the past, another is often a pretty distinct situation), and a skilled coach will help you uncover your own values and conclusions. When you work with a divorce coach you aren’t floundering on your own to work things out, you aren’t paying an attorney to fill a role outside of their expertise usually at a higher rate, and you aren’t being led down a path that serves someone else.
In this time of social distancing, how do you coach someone?
The easiest way is to coach someone right now is through Zoom video calls or phone calls. There are several other interfaces, but we’re able to get a lot done by connecting through technology. If we’re not able to be face to face, it doesn’t mean progress has to stop. It just means we need to be a little more innovative and flexible about how we move forward. During this first week of Covid-19 social distancing, I’ve had five Zoom calls with clients. Some calls are tactical; there’s a deadline that needs to be addressed. Others are how to move their process forward or a specific issue they are wrestling with at that time, like parenting decisions. It’s infinitely possible to communicate through technology right now and keep momentum. It’s not the same as sitting in the room together, but it is a way to connect.
For the client, that means that they can have a sense of still having somebody to talk to. They are not isolated and can bounce ideas off of someone.
We can have casual meetings just to touch base, “Hey, this came up. What do I do about it?” Or, we can have a formal appointment, using the traditional hour-long session just as we would in person. We can also loop in another professional when necessary.
What do they need to do to reach out to you to set something up?
They can reach out through my website, https://bridge-ing.com/. They can also reach out via phone or email to have a quick consult, to find out where they are and the best way to support them in moving forward.